or “All is Fair in... Camelot”
Traditionalists will argue that the first place you kiss a woman is on the lips. Carefully. Eyes closed. Three-second rule. Full-immersion. Serious grown-up face afterwards. Try not to mention her cherry chapstick. These same (certainly) canonized experts will tell you that before engaging in any serious business affair you should read Sun Tzu's “The Art of War.” Carefully. Eyes open. Three-day rule. Full-immersion and serious face required. Mentioning how the book smells like cherry chapstick is optional. It probably won't. The copy I borrowed from the library at fifteen smelled like the awesome private tutor my grandmother paid to teach me physics. My copy – picked up secondhand in Copley Square – smells like patchouli and red wine... which is what happens when you misread a college boy during a cram session and lose your pink highlighter to the couch pillow monster. But hey... that's another story.
Kinda.
One of my personal Seven Wonders of the World, Wikipedia tells us that “The Art of War,” used to influence not only countless RL military actions but far more business launches, approaches and hostile take overs, was “...first to recognize the importance of positioning in strategy and that position is affected both by objective conditions in the physical environment and the subjective opinions of competitive players in that environment. [It] taught that strategy was not planning in the sense of working through a to-do list, but rather that it requires quick and appropriate responses to changing conditions. Planning works only in a controlled environment, but in a competitive environment, competing plans collide, creating unexpected situations.” The thirteen concise chapters chronicle, more than anything else, how a leader must guide his force to victory. Like Hawking's “A Brief History of Time,” it is a much ballyhooed text that almost everyone owns but very few have dared to read beyond the jacket copy.
The Chinese have had “The Art of War” since 6 BC. The rest of us? Not until 1782 AD. The next time you wonder why everything is marked “Made in China,” you'll know; they had an 1788 year head start. Deal.
By nature and design, chance and strategy, all of my friends growing up were older than I was. Two grades ahead and in public school only part-time, I found I learned best when I was just observing. It was like life was a movie with a massive cast – teachers, strangers on the street, students – and I could watch and listen, measuring positive and negative results, quietly calculating ratios of success and failure. It was very unnerving, friends told me years later, when I would finally speak and always wound up saying exactly what they needed to hear. This led me to be in some... interesting... situations. Situations that I very consciously got myself into just to see if I could... and, admittedly, sometimes just to see if I could because Billy couldn't LOL!
I. The Calculations
At some point, we must stop and take stock. We must determine, in life, in love, in war (read: business) what we have, what we're up against and how it all fits. We must size up the competition and ascertain what we have that they do not. We must be clear, baby, with ourselves. We must know the lay of the land before we take up arms.
II. The Challenge
Why are we doing this? It is worth it? What will fighting this battle, winning this battle mean? What will this love entail? What will go into waging this war? Do you see how these powerful forces parallel like sky and sea? Like lines of text saying:
You: I love you.
Me: I love you, too.
*holding you*
*not letting go*
Ms. Angel,
We are writing
to offer you...
III. The Plan of Attack
The stratagem behind attack is unity. It isn't about money. It's about time. It isn't about man power (support). It's about action in tandem. The cogs make the machine. They are the machine. They are small alone, making something large and far-reaching together. The ripples in the pond theory. The machine is synchronized to perfection. One heart. One passion. One path.
IV. Positioning
How to move naturally from stage to stage. How to not lose a held position even when moving to a new one. To allow room to fall back, without loss, at any time. To not make opportunities but find them. That one always baffled me. We're told other times not to wait for opportunity but to make it. For more than a quarter century I stumbled there. Then I fell in love.
Christ helps those who help themselves. He will not drag you down your path. Clear the brambles, make it happen. But the path is already there. “Finding” opportunities does not mean waiting for them. It means discovering them. Exploring, seeking, gently coaxing the leaves aside, removing thorny briers to uncover the sacred place that has always been there.
V. Directing
Timing, harnessing momentum, and using your unique mind—creative and freed from cliche-- to guide your mission. This is me saying, “If I love you like new dawn and with the strength of prayer in my heart, will you say, if not 'yes,' than at least 'maybe'?” This is me saying, “Dear Mega Corp, I sincerely thank you for your offer but my brand, like my soul, is not for sale. Not for five figures. Not for six. Not for any number. Should you decide to reconsider your heartless contractual properties and swallow a great big humanity pill, you may want to contact me... through my MySpace. *kissies* Ms. Angel”
VI. Illusion and Reality
Find out the truth. Like Gillian Anderson, it is out there and it looks darn good in pure white gowns, modestly cut and elegantly presented with wit, humor and a self-assured gaze. Size up the competition but not just the competition. Size up the environment. The world in which you exist. Not the world in general. Your world. Find it. And figure out what matters and what is just smoke and mirrors. Start by kissing in the moonlight (not on the lips) and transition into reading “Your Marketing Sucks” instead of “The Art of War.” Because, in love and war, there is no such thing as mind share, baby.
VII. Engaging the Force
Do not seek out confrontation just to prove your mettle. Do not force another into confrontation just because you're too stupid to think of another solution. Flooding ten thousand troops into a narrow ravine will *not* guarantee that two will get through. Nor will emotionally brutalizing (read: creating drama for) your lover bring you closer together due to shared turmoil and heart-pounding. Get a room. Much more pleasant. When the opposition must be faced head-on... plan it out. Keep your head. The “Dummies”-knock off series is titled, “Keep It Simple, Stupid.” There's an acronym worth contemplating. In business? Make your attack so heart-breakingly beautiful that the competition is left breathless ;)
VIII. The Nine Variations
The key is adaptation. Allow surprise to show in the eyes but never in the voice. Be prepared for and be prepared with multiple reactions and responses. All with grace and certainty. An articulate sentence is finely-crafted. A joyous, passionate, “heart-felt” exclamation is equally valuable.
A friend once said to me, after watching me court a paramour, “You are so dang *smooth*...” I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. Knowing that all parts are connected and every presentation reflects and affects every other, I smiled winningly. “It's a delicate position to be in, don't you think, Kurt? Very 'Art of War.'” And we stared at each other without words until he looked away and we went to In 'n' Out for 2x3s.
IX. Moving the Force
You become comfortable in one arena and you secretly want to stay there. You are not prepared to move (nor do you truly desire to) and so... you stay. This can happen by emotional, even unintentional, sabotage. To avoid this pit of hissy snakes, contemplate and consider the arenas ahead. You may not have all the answers, but begin to formulate your position now... and begin to consider these arenas true possibilities. Claim them. Before you realize it, you'll wake up in one of them and know exactly what to do.
X. Situational Positioning
Different situations call for different positioning. Seems simple? Not so much if you ever dated as a teenager. One position does *not* actually work for every situation and one size *never* fits all, baby. My sweet may be his sappy. My smooth might be her poetry. Know the possibilities -- distance, dangers, barriers – and deal. Don't get to the trailhead and find yourself in the wrong shoes for a five-mile hike (heels won't do, babe). Don't find yourself dancing tight and close only for her (oh my...) gaze to make you stumble over the neon piping in the floor, crash into a small round table, somersault past a speaker, and wind up bum-over-tea-kettle (what does that even mean?!) blinking up at her like a new baby... while she blithely continues her body roll.
XI. The Nine Situations
Determine the most common situations – the nine common grounds on which you may be forced to take a stand – and discover your approach for waging war (or making love... which, in this case means not sex but making a relationship work... one could even say waging love) on this ground. Sun Tzu called the nine ground situations: Dispersive; facile; contentious; open; intersecting paths; serious; difficult; hemmed-in, and desperate. These have always worked for me. In game design. In business approach. In courting. My position is adaptive and unique to each lay of the land.
XII. The Fiery Attack
The weapon-aided attack. The attack made with elements outside one's self. Attacks which rely upon external force. Employing tactics, aspects or objects which we were not born with. *wicked grin* I've never had to resort to this type of attack. I like to keep everything close to home. Though... one might argue, that this attack includes what we wear, the signage we use, and the colors we splash across our faces or letterhead. One might argue that everything outside of words – the flowers we send, the media kits – is the fiery attack. In that case... I usually start my attack with my lace top from Paris and black leather chaps... or a smart, relevant headline on bright white paper. Bold. 14 point. Black.
XIII. The Use of Intelligence
Use spies. Yes, that kind of intelligence. Talk to friends. Infiltrate forums. Gather information. There is no such thing as knowing your lover too well or knowing the competition too well. Just be certain to *process* your intelligence. Facts only become intelligence when applied to the principles and situational instances we're just talked about.
* * *
Thirteen chapters. So complex, balanced and perfect to apply to two (or more) major elements in our lives. But is this a Sunday blog? I could say, “Yes. Because I'm tired of so-called 'Christian business books' fixating on WWJD simplicities and almost ensuring that no Christian will ever build a company that can truly contend.” I could say, “This is a blog about my life. And my life is not only prayer and scripture, just as it isn't only d6s or pixel rates.” I might even be able to get away with, “I refuse to let one more stranger compare me to Bradley Trevor Greive because even though I love a good CU of an elephant's butt as much as the next grrl, I really don't think that life can be better understood by gazing at deer threesomes.”
But the real reason this blog is about the patterns of Sun Tzu and the art of... well... the art of *life* is because today, September 14, 2008, my friend, O.S. designer, publisher, patron, and mentor, Jennifer DiMarco, turns 35. If there was a fourteenth chapter to “The Art of War” it would be about the importance of having a Jennifer on your team. But guess what? There's only one, and I never did learn to share so well.
Jennifer is the epitome of Sun Tzu. She is all thought and silent contemplation. She makes decisions so quickly and decisively that she makes the rest of us look like we're out of sync. I do believe she thinks at the speed of light which is why her denim-blue eyes are so darn unnerving. You've read about her a dozen times before in this blog. She's the fighter, the mother, the businesswoman. She is not infinitely patient. She is not perfect. She is flawed. But she is the nearest I have ever known to a master strategist and my life, and the Mardi Gras 3000 brand, would not be what it is today without her.
My gift to her is winding its way through USPS. A White Stag shirt she sent me to use as a smock. It has a mock collar and crisp lines. She had a stroke after the birth of her son and sometimes she forgets things. She seems to have forgotten that when I first met her, when I was a preteen and she was “just” an author on tour, this was exactly the shirt she wore. And there is no way I am worthy. Not yet any way ;)
So because my gift is stuck in transit, this blog will have to substitute. A crash course for my 3000+ readers. Pick up a copy of “The Art of War” and wrest a little more control of your life and your destiny. The next time you ask yourself, “WWJD?” You might just mean a different J.
With love to all my friends, readers and detractors ;)
EJ
